12:25 p.m. - 2001-04-22
me (a non-poetry entry)
There's been an unfortunate turn of events. My poetry book is missing, and even though I've turned both houses upside down, I can't find it.

I guess I could make this into a real diary from time to time, since when other people only fill their diaries with poetry, it bores me to death :)

For anyone who doesn't know me already, my name is Hannah, I'm seventeen, and I'm a junior at E-town. When I go to college, I want to major in philosophy and minor in music theory/composition. Eventually, I want to either author or write music, although first I'd have to grow self-discipline. I thought I liked journalism until I took a course in it; which is when I discovered that no, I didn't, it's filled with skirting around the real deal and emphasizing untruths and playing to an audience, which, really, isn't what they should be doing.

I don't know what people think about me when they see me, whether I have any moral code or not, I don't know if they see what I think I am. I don't do drugs, not because I think they're wrong, but because my brain can mess itself up just fine (and it has) by itself. Maybe it's really because I haven't had the chance to. I like to go to punk concerts and mosh myself to a mass of bruises. Someday I want to go to a rave. As for sex, everyone thinks I'm so much more jaded than I am, just because of the ease with which I talk about it. Really, I see sex as an expression of the moment, a slow dance to the muse. Love and sex can be intertwined or unrelated; I couldn't begin to judge on the basis of my own lack of experience. What is the population of hell after the sixties, if sex before marriage is a sin? If sex were solely to make babies, then we've expanded on God's intentions, which can't be a bad thing.

And no, I don't believe in the Christian God like I've been referring to him. It's all-inclusive and I don't believe that everyone lives in the same, inclusive world. The closest I've come to any sort of belief is the multiverse, in which universes exist side by side, without the slightest awareness that the other is there. I'd only come to create an edge of that belief before someone sent me this link: (since I'm web-impaired I can't figure out how to make this come up as a link)

http://www.newenglandghosts.com/what_are_ghosts.htm

, which is really meant to be about ghosts, but touches on a whole world theory which I put a lot of stock in. It just makes the most sense to me. I find it hard to believe that not only are we the only life in the universe, but the only universe in all of time and space. All it takes is a slightly different vibration and we can all exist on slightly different planes.

Anyway, read the link and it'll make more sense...

I'm off to listen to Incubus.

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