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8:51 p.m. - April 03, 2002
blow a raspberry
I need to fall asleep less. In public, at least... or on other people's floors or couches or.. um.. elevators, I suppose, if friends are to be believed. (How do you drop off standing up? I mean... I've done it, more than once, but how?) Anyway, (Mike: 'There shall be no more spitting in my room.') That's what happens when Camille tries to wake me up and I'm tired and angry so I blow a raspberry at her, and she says, 'Go on, just TRY that again," so I do, and she pinches my tongue between her nails and I blow a much messier one, since my tongue is arrested.

Yesterday we ditched the second half of school today for the sole purpose, it seems, of eating Pineyard and driving to Highwood to play on railroad tracks. Which is not to say it wasn't worth it; it was. I haven't run around in fresh air like that for, well, awhile, and haven't rolled down hills backwards in years. A month ago I doubt I'd have been able to support my weight on my hands. So it was good. I felt giddy for the rest of day, in a really nice way; I felt charitable enough, and this is a huge sacrifice for me, to let someone else play their music in my car. On the way there when he tried that I was thisclose to reaching over the backseat and wringing his neck. However, a few cartwheels cured me.

How to compliment Camille: just do it. If you need incentive, do it to make up for my lack of ever complimenting anyone, ever. I'll laugh at her eye makeup and say it's very pink, and try to drop coins through the coinslot shirt, but that's about it. Not because I can't find anything to compliment, but because most of my compliments, (to her and to anyone else) are very, very backhanded and aren't usually taken the way they're meant. Example 1: 'I never thought you'd have a bitch; I always pictured you as being someone else's bitch.' Said to Rachel, this was actually meant as a compliment, that she could defy preconceptions and also whip someone in the process. Sort of a fucked up congratulatory handslap. Example 2: 'I can spot you from down the hall because you're the only person I know who'd wear neon green pants.' Said to Dan, this was complimenting his unique style (I fucking love those green pants.) Example 3: 'You should go down to the sperm bank and replace the jars of Paul's sperm with jars of yours.' Said to David. Translation: 'I'd rather have little versions of you running around the world in a few years than little versions of him,' or, 'you're a worthwhile human being.'

There you have it. I've got to take a shower with my yummylicious new shower gel stuff, which smells amazing and feels amazing and is amazing, so I'll try and dream about impossible things.

 

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