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9:38 p.m. - 2001-08-20
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I just finished recording the vocal track on a song I haven't titled, but its gist is 'I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't like me... I am living a lie, so what, I'm a liar...' 'i'm gonna sing it and i'm gonna sing it and i'm gonna sing it again...i'm gonna sing it 'til you understand..'

There's not many words, and most of the vocals aren't meant to be really understood... more like kind of a human rhythm section. I sing triplet, the drums and the bass are in two, the keyboard is kind of swinging. I'm not sure quite how it worked out, but it did somehow.

I love listening to something, long enough so I can lean back and relax, and know that *I* created it. It's a different exhilaration than a band, where it's a kind of collective high, when everything's finally fallen together. The solo project takes a lot more concentration but less cooperation, and there's no distraction. If you don't like something you can't blame it on the faulty guitarist. It's you who played it in on the keyboard with your hot little hands, and you KNOW it. On this song, only about two and a half minutes long, I know I've spent at least seven hours making everything fit. It gives a new meaning to what it means to have a creative outlet. Not only do you need a creative outlet, but you need another kind of outlet to release all the frustration from the first one!

I have to go walking, but I just want to ask everyone who took the time to read this to the end to do me one favor:

Tell someone you like their art, or their music, or their voice, or their acting. Something. You don't know how valuable that is until you've been slaving away at something forever, and someone notices.

I can't talk though, because I hole myself up in my room and don't really show it to anybody :) But I'm speaking generally here...

 

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