22:31 - October 30, 2002
nothing with holes in it
Still snowing. The bus took over a half hour to get to the music building stop after the completely unsatisying 7PM lecture on the 'contradiction between the Christian concept of God and the traditional concept of Hell' (my god it was horrible, so horrible I walked out after fifteen minutes, he was reading off a script he had handed out to us, and the concepts were all ones I'd heard before, and I'm only eighteen and not even a religion major. or minor. or any sort of scholar whatsoever. anyway.) and to pass the cold cold time at the bus stop I made interesting designs with the steam coming from my mouth; swirling tendrils around my head, a smokestack into the night, tiny puffs of white. I detest cold, and I detest the fact that my shoes don't keep out the cold, and that my chin gets numb as if I'm on Novocaine and that my nose runs, unprovoked, into the collar of my jacket with me unable to do anything about it lest my gloves get all mucky. Stupid cold. Matt throws a snowball at me as I'm running into the building and I very nearly bite his head off.

Tomorrow I have a job interview. I need money so that I can live. That is a strange concept to a college kid.

Hallowe'en tomorrow as well and it's all white and fuzzy and freezing and nobody in their right mind would go as a whore (her words, not mine) with her boyfriend as a pimp. 'I've got this great top and these falsies that look amazing,' she gushes to me in the Haven, snow falling steadily outside. My smile, I hope, is hidden well beneath my coat's collar. I am, of course, jealous because I don't have a costume, at least that's what I'd be in her eyes, but the fact is I won't even be home much tomorrow; classes at 8, 9, 11, and 5; job interview at 1, practice at 3, composition at 6:30. If I'm dressed as anything it'll be 'business attire' what they told me to wear to the interview. I am taking that to mean 'nothing with holes in it'.

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