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5:51 p.m. - October 08, 2001
conflicted
your power, your hunger, your cunning traps.. his stature, his carelessness, his afternoon naps... you love him, you hate him, he comes from your passion, a new direction, an aimless fashion... you power means nothing in a free world.

What I will always aspire to be -

and fulfillment of these will result in the complete draining of my soul - so YOU clean me up -

- not to say that these are morally right or even what I truly want -

to be:

brilliant - and able to express it perfectly

desired by the immediate world

repelled by the mediocrity of emotion

sex-obsessed and yet still fulfilled

able to turn heads in the streets

within a strange circle or circles of friends

living a childhood dream

uninhibited and free of classification

able to speak exactly how I think.. and mean

truly loved by the only one I want to love me

a wanderer, at least once

strong and able to recover from the repercussions of the above

dying for a purpose

with his head in my lap

 

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